On Giving and Receiving

The older I get the more my understanding of giving and receiving deepens.

As my understanding grows I grow and it expands my life in the most beautiful ways.

Given that Thanksgiving is just around the corner I thought it would be appropriate to discuss giving and receiving.

Some time ago I was talking about this very thing with my son and realized it was easiest told in a story.

If it seems childish, it is.  This is the story I told my son.

Once upon a time there were two boys named Bob and Tom.

One day at school they were having a party and, among many other treats, there were pixie sticks.  Now this was a favorite with all the children and they were all very excited.  They were each given a goody bag full of candy, pixie sticks included.  Almost all the children received six pixie sticks however poor Bob received 2 by mistake(obviously this would not happen in real life.  Stick with me-it's for the story).

Bob looked around the room and realized that all the other children had six pixie sticks and he only had two.  And then Bob thought "Geez!  It just figures that I'd only get two pixie sticks and everyone else would get six!  This stinks!  I always get jipped!  I always get left out of everything!  I work hard.  I'm a good kid.  It's not fair! Look at Tom over there, so smug with his six pixie sticks.  He always gets everything and I get nothing!!!  Man, that is so irritating.  I can't stand him and his pixie sticks".

Bob chooses to quietly smolder in the corner, missing out on all the fun, while the rest of the class enjoys the party.

Meanwhile Tom opens his bag and notices his six pixie sticks.  He also happens to notice that Bob only has two pixie sticks.  And he begins to think....

"Huh, wonder why Bob only got two pixie sticks?  It was obviously some kind of mistake.  He looks really unhappy.  I guess I ought to share some of mine with him but I really don't want to!  I really don't want to have to share with him!  This stinks!  He's probably expecting me to give him mine just because I have more than he does.  I don't really want to share but, I could share a couple of mine.  It wouldn't be that big of a deal I guess.  I mean I'd still have four anyway and he'd have four.  I guess I will."

And so Tom gives Bob two pixie stick.

"Here.  I don't really need that many anyway" says Tom.  "Thanks" says Bob.

"Wanna hang out? says Bob.  "Sure" says Tom.  And as only children can do they quickly forget they were ever upset in the first place.  They get onto the business of playing and enjoying each other's company.

What they know without having to express is that once they made the tough choice to give and to receive it just gets better and better.

How often do we get stuck in our egos unwilling to see any other point of view?

Going against your ego is always uncomfortable but it's also always worth it.

Funny thing is that a lot of the people I know personally are wonderful givers but they aren't so good at receiving.
The reality is that both are equally important.  Receiving is just as much an art as giving.

How many times have you asked God for something but couldn't seem to get out of your own way in order to receive it?

Maybe that's never happened to you but I know it's happened to me.  I try to remember that so I can make a new choice.  I think it's just like everything in life, it takes practice.

How many times do we get stuck in resentment and judgement of what someone else has or hard feelings of shame and embarrassment of what we do have?

I've read that being poor doesn't make someone else rich and being sick doesn't make someone else healthier.

I think we have to get to a point of trusting in God's endless Good.  We have to know that there is more than enough to meet ALL of our needs and that if we can step out of shame, fear and judgement great things will happen.

I hope this helps open  your heart even more to giving and receiving this holiday season.

May you be Blessed by both!